it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize