windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
