is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
