She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
