so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Naked. naked and bneed help.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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