I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
