But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
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