Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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