...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Randomize
