Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
