hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Semen is not good for contacts.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Randomize