He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Randomize
