3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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