He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize