...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
