Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
