Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
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