On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
