i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I enjoy the company of your penis
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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