What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize
