Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
