Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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