marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Randomize
