i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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