its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
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