i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
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