I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
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