You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
he wants to bone in the snuggie
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize