You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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