But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
