This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
