Non-Jews are for practice
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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