Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
it's like heaven, but drunker
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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