the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
where does the pee come out of this thing
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize