Fine. I'll sleep in my office
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Text me some of your sweat
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