remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize