A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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