it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
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