Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize