Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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