I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
