thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
My liver just broke up with me...
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I have fence marks all over my body
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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