They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize
