Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
