I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize