oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize