Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
