i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize
