Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
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