I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
