Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
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